Why Politeness and Etiquette Matter

If I may beg your indulgence

“Labor to keep alive in your breast that little spark of celestial fire called conscience.” — George Washington

The other day I saw someone question etiquette.

“Why do we have all of these rules, anyway?” they asked. “And who says these are the rules?”

I took his questioning to be born of curiosity rather than of rebellion, so I considered it for a bit.

In looking into it, I found that nearly 5,000 years ago Ptahotep, a minister of the Pharaoh Isesi wrote the “First Code of Conduct.” This manual, appearing two thousand years before the Bible, showed young people how to find their way in society by following civilized rules of good manners.

In an era when personal freedom reigns supreme and “do your own research” is the clarion call of the misinformed, civility and politeness stand out. Adhering to an agreed-upon set of standards keeps us aligned.

In short, self-control and good manners are central to a society. But more than that, they’re about how you treat other people.

When he was a young man, George Washington wrote a handbook called Rules of Civility & Decent Behavior in Company and Conversation. He based it on a set of rules composed by French Jesuits in 1595 and this is the first rule:

“Every action done in company ought to be with some sign of respect to those that are present.”

With that in mind, let’s explore a little more deeply the underlying reasons behind etiquette and politeness.

Why Etiquette and Politeness Matter

Social Harmony

Etiquette and politeness are the lubricants that keep social interactions running smoothly. They help to avoid conflicts and misunderstandings, creating a more harmonious and pleasant social environment.

Respect

Politeness is a way of showing respect for others. It acknowledges their worth and dignity, regardless of their social status, age, or background.

Effective Communication

Being polite enhances communication. When people are respectful and considerate in their interactions, they are more likely to be heard and understood. This is crucial in both personal and professional settings.

Professional Success

In the workplace, etiquette and politeness can significantly contribute to professional success. People who are polite and respectful are often viewed more favorably by their colleagues, superiors, and clients. They are more likely to be chosen for promotions and leadership roles.

Cultural Sensitivity

Different cultures have different norms and expectations regarding etiquette and politeness. Understanding and practicing these norms is essential for cross-cultural communication and for avoiding unintentional offenses.

Building Relationships

Politeness and etiquette are key to building and maintaining positive relationships. Treating others with respect and courtesy can foster trust, cooperation, and loyalty in personal and professional relationships.

Self-Image

How we present ourselves to others reflects on our self-image. Politeness and good etiquette contribute to a positive self-image and can boost self-confidence.

Personal Growth

Practicing good manners and politeness can be a path to personal growth and self-improvement. It encourages self-awareness and self-discipline.

Mental Well-Being

Being polite and respectful can contribute to one's mental well-being. It reduces stress, as it minimizes the likelihood of confrontations and conflicts.

Community and Society

Etiquette and politeness are essential for the well-being of communities and societies. They help maintain order, encourage civility, and contribute to the overall betterment of society.

Being polite and following the rules of etiquette not only reflects well on you, but it takes into account how other people feel.

And that’s Classy AF.