How to Raise a Respectable Child
Or more generally: how to be a respectable person
Tomorrow is Father’s Day, the day associated with images of dads happily napping in hammocks.
Although the first celebration of the holiday was in 1910, Father’s Day wasn’t given national holiday status until 1972.1
But it is a day worth mentioning here on Classy AF because we could all use the time to reflect on what being a father entails.
Being a parent is a lot like leadership: we’re bringing up the next generation, and it is our responsibility to bestow upon them the virtues, values, and character it takes to be a respectable and successful person in society.
One of the things I’ve done for each of my children is written bits of wisdom and advice into journals for them, so that when they reach adulthood, they’ll have a reminder and keepsake for my fatherly advice.2
Creating a Culture of Good Manners: Things to Remember
You may not be a parent, but this list applies to you just as well as it applies to what we might teach any child.
Use “please,” “thank you,” and “excuse me.”
Be generous with compliments and stingy with criticism.
Listen to your child when they speak to you, even if you’ve heard it before.
Do not discipline your child in front of others.
Do not correct any child other than your own on his manners, and always do that privately.
Be clear about what you expect.
Be consistent.
Do not give in to temper tantrums.
Do not lose your temper.
Admit when you are wrong and offer an apology when you owe one.
Let your child know when a discussion has become a decision.
Words can hurt; do not hurl them as weapons.
Respect your child’s privacy and boundaries. Knock first.
Do not impose your ideology, and respect those whose ideology differs from yours.
Agree to disagree.
Give credit where it is due.
Hold the door.
Lend a hand.
Be a good sport.
Be a gracious loser and generous winner.
Give more than you are asked.
Don’t take more than you need.
Leave a place cleaner than you found it.
Do not respond to rudeness with rudeness.
Winning is not the only thing and guys do finish first.
This certainly isn’t comprehensive. What would you add to this list?
Whether you are a father, celebrating a father, or simply someone who cares about instilling good values in others, that’s Classy AF.
Further Reading
These books are filled with timeless wisdom and advice that are good for anyone, whether you’re someone’s parent or someone’s child.
How to Raise a Gentleman: A Civilized Guide to Helping Your Son Through His Uncivilized Childhood by Kay West.
Rules for My Unborn Son by Walker Lamond
Rules for My Unborn Daughter by Walker Lamond
“The Surprisingly Radical History of Father’s Day,” by Augustine Sedgewick, TIME, June 12, 2025
“A Gift for My Children” Timeless & Timely